Born That Way
Off the Wall, September 17,

As I circled around the rooftops, I spotted one on a garage and decided to rest there a few minutes. The building was located at the junction of Pee Vee Alley and a perpendicular throughway.

I then decided to walk to the other side where I had a better view of the area. Standing there on the shingles, I noticed a rather strange creature looking up at me from below. It was clad with something on its head that shaded its face, a shirt with some kind of markings on it and what looked like short pants below it exposing two white legs with some type of footwear.

I decided to call it and see if it would respond. I gave it the famous ‘Kailey tweet’ as a cardinal would do, but got no response. After repeating my tweet, I somehow gained its attention.

“Hey there. What are you? You’re not made like me,” I said. “You are a bird, and I am a person,” came its response. God made me this way and you the way you are.”

Just then a pigeon landed above Kailey. In a recognizable tweet, she interrogated it about its differences. It replied, “God made me this way.”

Kailey then decided to fly to the adjacent white garage. As she stood there, a person was walking with some kind of creature. She called down to the person. “What’s that?” she tweeted, but the person was not aware that the cardinal was trying to contact him.

Then she had an idea. “I would tweet my ‘panic-tweet,’ and that may do the trick.”
So, Kailey went at it doing her thing. It worked. The fellow looked up at the bird and stated, “What is your problem?” “Oh,” she said, “I don’t have a problem. I just want to ask you a question. What is that creature you have there on that strap that has long hair, a tail, a funny-looking face and four legs?” “That is my dog, Chip. I am taking him for a walk.”

Kailey was soon learning there were differently made creatures other than herself.

She decided to fly to Legion Keener Park where a lot of her kind hung out. Upon arrival, she could see birds gliding above, that were far bigger than the pigeon. Waiting for one to land she tweeted to it, “Why are you so much bigger than I am and have such big claws?” He immediately understood and replied, “This is the way God made me.

Walking nearby the tree, Kailey could make out that a neatly clad person was taking a walk on the asphalt path. There was something different about him. As she looked closer, she saw that his color was dark brown instead of white. She tweeted to him and hoped he would respond. He heard her but did not realize that the bird was trying to communicate with him. She then went to her ‘panicky tweet.’ As always that did the trick.

“I can tell that you are a person, but why aren’t you white like the man I met in the backyard on Ligonier Street?” she stated. “That’s the way God made me. It was His choice that I am this color,” he said.

As she flew from tree to tree, she encountered two persons sitting closely together on a bench. She tweeted. Nothing happened. She entered stage two. It worked. Kailey asked, “Why are you two persons sitting so closely together.” “We are homosexuals, two men who love each other very much.”

“Were you created by God this way or did you choose this life?” Kailey asked.
“To my knowledge,” one of them stated, “God created most of us this way. However, there are some who choose this lifestyle.”

It was shortly thereafter that Kailey saw her first female persons. They were walking together on the path, talking as they went. Kailey decided to put stage two into play to get their attention. It worked.

She said, “Do you two love each other as much as the homosexuals on the bench?”
The slender longhaired blond stated, “No, we are fond of each other, but are not lesbians.” she stated.

Kailey then said, “Why not?” The other girl answered, “Because God didn’t make us that way. He made us all individualistic, creatures of His own making. Our mission on His behalf is to love one another beyond all else as He has instructed us.

After digesting the wisdom, Kailey flew away.

- Paul J. Volkmann
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